Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Day 4 (day 2 in the foster home)

We started the morning with hot cakes for breakfast.  James loves to help in the kitchen and helped Diane make the batter.  He was still very uninterested in me, but he did play some hide and seek with me, which included him throwing a little rubber lizard at me from across the room.  He thought this was hilarious.  When he wants to play a trick on someone he will put his finger over his mouth like he is sshhh-ing.  Even though he's not at all quiet with all his giggling!  He also let me play cars with him with his matchbox cars.  Later on he came into our room again and I tried to show him pictures but he was much more interested in the big magnifying glass and this eagle toy that was in the room.  We took him outside and he and Jason played baseball and I took some pictures.  Then Diane took us in the former army jeep into town for a tour.  Jason sat in the front seat and I sat in the back with James.  Diane wanted him to sit on my lap for safety and I was more than happy to oblige.  He actually let me hold him on my lap with no fuss.  Whenever we got in the jeep he would collect all our water bottles and put them in the basket that was evidently for that purpose.  Then when we stopped he had to get them and hand them out again.  He knew whose was whose too!  Diane took us to this little park-like place that was at the edge of town by the water, an old church, and then the market.  The market was quite an experience.  Tents were lined up selling clothes and other random things.  The clothing tents reminded me of Goodwill, just piles and piles of clothes.  James wanted to Jason to carry him, and I felt much safer with this, since he does not like to hold anyone's hand.  We went in the official open market where we saw everything you would expect - meat hanging or piled up on trays with flies everywhere, tables of fish and a lady butchering some big sea creature, lots of fruits and vegetables, roasted meat on skewers that I really wanted to try but was too scared of its safety (or lack thereof), and even bags of cooked noodles for pancit.  The place was crowded and smelly, and outside all along the edge of the road was nasty water in a ditch.  I can't imagine what happens when it rains and it overflows.  Before we left Diane bought James a popsicle in one of the stores that was like a pharmacy of sorts, like Walgreens or Rite Aid.  He split it with me, which was good because he couldn't even eat his half fast enough before it melted all over him.  Did I mention it was really hot and humid??  On the way back we stopped at a little souvenir store and Diane bought t-shirts for James to give Aedan and Liana.  I bought a few things too, and James wanted to be in charge of holding the bag and making sure it arrived safely.  He loves to help!!  He fell asleep on my lap on the way back but woke up as soon as we got home.  After lunch I took him to play in  the water, which was colder than I expected but not bad.  I think he would have stayed in there all day if I let him.  We had a really good time playing together, but for the rest of the day he wanted nothing to do with me.  While he took a nap Diane went over all his medical records and paperwork with us.  No surprises there, we had seen pretty much everything already. 
By this point Jason and I were both ready to just take James and go!  Besides just wanting to go home in general, it was very hard having to just sit there and watch other people do my job as mom.  They didn't give us the opportunity to establish ourselves as his parents and caregivers.  I kept reminding myself that they only had another day with him and I would have the rest of his life.  And I was grateful for the opportunity to see him in his environment and learn about his habits and personality, and hear stories about him.  But it was hard to watch them spoil him, knowing it was going to make the transition that much harder.  We are pretty stuctured and strict in our home, and this was not the case there.  I have to say, looking at it now, a week later, it hasn't yet been as bad as I anticipated.  I'm sure the time will come when he challenges us, but for now he's really easy going.






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